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A God for the brokenhearted

God has been working in me for the last couple of weeks. I know he has been working in me way longer but, it seems as if he's speaking to me louder so that i can finally hear him. For awhile i've been broken and hurting. The pain that i have allowed myself to suffer is unbelievable. I say "allowed" myself to suffer beacuse I wasn't reaching out in my time of need to my father. The things that I have endured probably wouldn't have had such an impact if clung on to God and allowed him to love and heal me. I want to share my story to let those who are broken, afflicted and feel that they are not worthy of God's love to know that he does love you. I have spent a long time being angry for what i went through and not fully allowing God to work in me. I recently spoke to a friend about my brokeness and how i felt as though God nor anyone elsse will truely love me because i'm not worthy of love. After our talk i headed to bed. Before i went to sleep i started reading my daily devotional, i couldn't find the new one so i opened a three month old one. What i discovered within the devotional filled me up with so much love that it was almost unbearable. At that moment i felt Jesus lying next to me and personally telling me what was in the devotional. The topic was " wonderfully made" and the scripture was Psalm 139: 7-16. there's a particular part that welled my heart with so much love and happiness. It said " How precious are your thoughts of me God!" In this Psalm, David is thinking about his conception, and vividly describes God's thoughts as he wove him together in his mother's womb, creating a unique and special indivisual to be the object of his love. How wonderful is that? To be loved so much that God created us to be the object of his love. It truely blows my mind to know that my God loves me that much. I have never been one of those people who comes to church and not cry ( well since i've been an adult that is). This sunday was'nt any different. This sunday i went to church with my friend. So here i am in this new church, standing and sitting and sitting and standing and singing and praying ( LOL). I was sitting down and it was prayer time, out of no where this lady comes from behind me and hugs me. She started whispering in my ears saying " I never do this but i really felt compelled to come up to you and tell you that that God loves you. Right now i see Jesus and two angels sitting next to you. Jesus wants you to know that he loves you and will never hurt you like those people did, you have to stop doubting him and and let him love you." ( Then the flood gates opened) I have never felt such a powerful moment in my life. God loves me so much that he's showing me that, through scriptures and random people. There has been times when i have felt lost, and i did not feel his presence. But now God wants me to know that he will NEVER abandone nor forsake me. I believe that it is through our darkest hour that we see God the clearest. God has foundd and restored me, many time i have cried and sought him. How silly of me? I now know that no matter what happens he will never let go, I may let go but it's not me who's holding on, it's never been me. Brothers and sisters my prayer is in your darkest hour know that he is the light. There isn't anything that's too great nor too trivial for him, after all he is the maker of all things. Pray fervently even though you don't feel his presence, because when you finally feel him he's going to rock your world.

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